Finally I figured it all out; why I keep getting the same lessons over and over again - they've got something to do with my unusual circumstances (that I have created) and handsome men (that someone else created - HA).
The ultimate purpose in life is to exist in the present moment, to find the truest self that is observing your emotions and thoughts within. The aim of the game is freedom from form, achieving thoughtless existence and one-ness with creation. Everything is an internal experience, life happens inside of us and with the intelligence given, we can shape this experience.
Simply put: just bliss out, no matter your circumstances.
Therefore, forming any sort of attachment is an illusion of permanence. Nothing is permanent, nobody is here to stay. The past two decades of blogging, the drama and insecurities are finally completely obsolate. They make content for drama/comedy and other nonsense form of entertainment that can be used as currency in our economic growth driven society.
So with this realisation I leave you here, although for the sake of nonsense I would return. Whatever life has in store for us, for me, almost doesn't matter anymore. I will continue to seek this inner balance and extend an arm for those who are in need.
I plan to not reborn again, so if I can do this work in this waking life I better not waste another day. Now that the world is ending in a more tangible way, I await to return to the Source and become the light I am called to be.